In no particular order:
1. People who used the word boobs. It really bothers me. This particular annoyance came to mind this morning when I read a mention of the book "Boobs: A Guide to Your Girls." I especially hate it when women refer to their own breasts as boobs, or even worse, tits. It seems like a special kind of self-hatred. Please, ladies, refer to them as breasts. Give them the reverence they deserve.
2. In Jane Brody's column about BMI on Tuesday, she, or some hack doctor she quotes, says that it's thoroughly possible for a 125 pound, 5 foot 5 inch woman to be fat. Shut the front door. Jane, this is frigging impossible. I am resisting the impulse to say you are going senile.
3. An ad for a plastic surgeon in The Montclair Times today asks, "Do you suffer from cellulite?" Suffering? Really? I'm almost speechless. There is a lot of suffering in this world, to be sure, very little of it from cellulite.
4. Tracking down payment for freelance articles published in May. DRIVING ME BONKERS. It amounts to 600 measly dollars and the number of polite emails I have sent is staggering. I'm getting ready to name publications. PAY ME, NOW, MOTHERFUCKERS.
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The word "tits" makes me gag. Unless I'm referring to a small bird. Even then, I prefer "small bird."
ReplyDeleteI'm horrified to learn that I've been suffering in silence for 37 years. Damn this cellulite!
ReplyDelete(Sheesh)
How are you on "vagina" euphemisms? And vagina isn't even the right word for everything collectively.
ReplyDeleteI feel like we gotta be perfect for vanity AND health issues these days.
I suspect Jane Brody is an compulsive exerciser. I believe she has written previously on how she blew out her knees and had double replacement due to over-doing it on tennis. (Beware, Christina) Also she has written about how her sons were forced to play outside during daylight hours, without addressing how today's parents are supposed to be supervising such activity, being that kids are mostly not allowed to roam freely anymore.
this won't make you any happier. especially the last graf:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.businessinsider.com/the-amount-of-lost-wages-for-unpaid-freelance-work-in-new-york-47-billion-2010-8
Thank you! I've always hated boobs and tits...I prefer breasts or tatas.
ReplyDeleteI know I'm not allowed to say anything here, but why is "boobs" lame? I just need to be reminded. To me it sounds sort of polite, whereas "breasts" sounds clinical, almost.
ReplyDeleteBryan, google "boobs" and see what comes up. That should clarify my disdain for the word.
ReplyDeleteHeather, "privates" works for me, or "penis" or "vagina" if one needs to specify.
Thanks for your comments, everyone! I love comments.
Amen! The tasteless B word needs to go, along with grown men in cargo shorts and tank tops in restaurants.
ReplyDeleteOh, shoot, I'm fat. And here I thought I was doing great in the low 130s!
ReplyDeleteChristina, I feel you on the freelance front. I'm waiting for $150 measly dollars for a story that was published in a national magazine in September 2008. I say name away so we can all steer clear! And I hope you get paid :-) And as far as "fat" at 125.....bitch, please.
ReplyDeleteWhile I enjoy the word "tits", I prefer "breasts", but I think calling them "the girls" is what's borderline gross and creepy.
ReplyDelete